I’m now reading “Bird by Bird” by Anne Lamott, a book about creative writing.* The chapter on Perfectionism was a great one. I liked the way it described perfectionism as “the obsessive belief that if you run carefully enough, hitting each stepping-stone just right, you won’t have to die”. I also liked the analogy that this could be psychic muscle cramp which we never healed, and the only way to fix it is by going through the pain of using those muscles.

I have a piece that’s been sitting on my floor for months which I’ve fixed up the sketch on at least 5 times. It’s now in a state that could be painted, but I can’t bring myself to painting it (knowing how long it took for me to make the sketch). At the same time, I have no vision for what this will look like. I haven’t worked on it because I am worried I’ll make a mistake and somehow the half-made painting is better than a bad looking painting. And having no idea what it should look like makes it difficult to bring a piece to light.

I’ll have to give up on making this sketch perfect because indeed, as the chapter suggests, it makes me frustrated just seeing it half done. Almost in a way, making a bad painting allows me to move on, and now I also realize I can choose to remake the same painting again.

The only trick I’ve had on this is to tell myself that this attempt is a practice attempt, and that lets me drop the feeling that it’s better to not paint than to produce something bad. Imagining that this is “not the real thing” can be applied to many areas in life.

*The book was gifted to me by my friend at High Comedic Value and I deeply appreciate it! Check out his work, it might make you laugh!